May you be consulted to the point of annoyance
on when, how and whether you wish to be born.
May you be afflicted
with rose-scented farts.
May you endure a lifelong
aversion to offal and tripe.
May the dog bite that wakes you to put out
a house fire be an inconvenience of sorts.
May your skill on the contrabassoon
become a source of embarrassment.
May strangers pick
pillow fights with you.
May your wellbeing
prove terminal.
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